Life Is Beautiful...

Bila boring takder benda nak fikir...

2006-11-28T15:09:00.000+08:00

ha ha ha.. Semalam aku tido hotel. Hehe.. Dapat upgraded room. 2 bedroom Executive - Bali style. Syok Syok. Tapi yang tak best nya tu aku kena tido sorang-sorang setelah tidak berjaya mencari teman bermalam. Setiap Isnin aku telah ditugaskan sebagai M.O.D ( Manager On Duty ). Tugas M.O.D adalah untuk menjaga hotel. Apa-apa masalah yang berbangkit, aku yang kena selesaikan. Kira Im in charge of the hotel on that particular night. Hehe.. Gila ker diorang nih? Masalah aku pun aku tak suka nak selesaikan, nak suruh aku selesai kan masalah orang? Sheesh.. Tapi part IM IN CHARGE tu, I likeee.. I likee.. hehe... Yang penting, aku dapat tido hotel free. Tak payah balik rumah yang jauh itu. Seronok kerja hotel ni rupanya. Makan hari-hari free. Parking hari-hari free. Dapat tido bilik free. Nasib baik aku tengah tak der boyfren ni. Nasib baik indeed.. :-) So next week, aku nak angkut kawan-kawan aku untuk menemani aku tido di sini.. Aku takut tido sorang-sorang sebenarnya ( Sebenarnya adalah takut tinggal sorang-sorang. Gila tak best..).

Speaking of which, tiba-tiba aku ter-imagine what if I was meant to be a spinster? Contohnya, aku sudah terlepas jodoh aku. Ataupun jodoh aku sudah menemui ajal nya sebelum sempat menemui aku, jodoh nya.Have to live this life alone everyday till the day I die? Hanya ditemani kucing kesayangan yang adalah sangat gemuk lagi manja serta pemalas? Adakah aku akan menjadi seperti Miranda dalam Sex And The City itu? She over fed the cat kerana sangat takut yang dia akan mati keseorangan. Ohh tidak! Aku akan mengambil seorang anak angkat yang secomel aku ( seperti didalam gambar kat dalam blog ini. Comel kan? Geram gila tengok muka budak 2 ekor nih!). Hehe.. Bila ada anak angkat, aku bolehlah bermain-main dengan si comel itu apabila pulang dari kerja. Dan aku boleh meniduri nya. Eh salah. Supaya dia boleh menemani aku tido setiap malam. Dan aku akan menyanyi atau membaca kan nya buku cerita sehingga kami berdua tertido. Ataupun aku akan mendengar setiap celoteh nya. Kanak-kanak kan suka bercerita dan sangat suka merepek repek. (Ke dia yang kena dengar masalah-masalah aku setiap malam?). *sigh*

Atau apakah akan jadi kalau aku telah berkahwin dan tidak mempunyai anak kandung? Adakah ini bermakna suami aku akan berkahwin lain dan menceraikan aku? Atau aku akan mendapat madu? Atau dia akan berkahwin secara senyap2 tanpa pengetahuan aku? hmmm.... Hairan. Kenapa aku berfikiran sedemikian rupa? entahlah.................

The Introduction

2006-11-17T18:08:00.000+08:00

Here I am again after a year. And through out the year, everyting has changed especially in my life. Well, most of the thing. New hairstyle, new job, new friends, and new status. Err.. actually back to the old status. Single. Above all, the hairstyle is the most daring change I've made.. Got the idea after watching Devils Wear Prada. I love love Anne Hatheway's hairstyle and decided to have it like that without thinking twice. Then, Bang! The new look kinda shocking to me and to everyone else. Some like it. Some dont. Hmmm......... Let it be laa..... Hope they'll grow faster.

New job, new environment. After being attached for almost two years with Ambank, I have decided to change my career path. From banking line to hotel line. A very bold decision for me, I would say. Well, after five days here in hotel line, I find it interesting. Wish me luck, people.

The status. Single. Single is mingle. Kinda loving it.

Well, enough on the introduction. Shall continue tomorrow.

Baby, What's up?

2005-10-07T15:25:00.000+08:00

SELAMAT BERPUASA TO ALL OF YOU. I t has been quite sometime since I last blogged, huh? Since my last handphone bill was RM480!!! Ceit. Pastu tak update blog pakai O2 lagi...Nasib baik hp bill tuh ada orang bayar kan.. Hihi.Selamat duit aku.

So,what's up with me?

* Im dating someone new now.16 months after my last relationship. And I really think that he's the coOlest boyfriend I've ever had, so far. Hopefully, he'd stay cOol jer macam sekarang nih. Insyaallah.

* I still cant quit smoking. Not even close. And the saddest part is, my bf doesnt smoke. Yeah. I know..Sounds teribble kan?

* At times, I really miss Mr.Kengster.

* I miss my Gasingan friends. " Aku rasa kita dah tak rapat laa..". Haha..Jeg sure menyampah dengar aku cakap ni. Dah lama tak lepak Raju tiap-tiap petang, kan? Dah lama tak tengok wayang ramai-ramai.. Semua orang asyik busy jer.. Buat hal masing-masing. I know this is already towards the end of the friendship. Amin and Kuril dah nak kahwin. Stone dah jadi pegawai besar kerajaan (nanti boleh aa ada farewell party 5juta plak..oopps!), Kuman dah nak pindah Gasing.Huh...

* I've fall in love with that DKNY messenger bag. But it's 600 bux!! I cant afford that now. Shite. Err, to some one I know..Would you,dear? Perfume I pun dah nak abis dah nih... Beli 1 cukup laa :-p

* Im broke. What else is new huh? Duit gaji habis bayar hutang credit card jer... And now kena bayar utang PTPTN plak.. Cibai aa diorang nih. Duit student pun nak palar!! Pegi laa mintak balik duit korang tuh kat orang-orang yang lari income tax. Kata negara dah maju. Setanding tu la, setanding ni lah. Orang ada aiport besar,kita pun nak ada jugak. Orang buat F1, kita pun nak jugak. Orang nak host Komanwel kita pun nak jugak. Gah jer. Bila dah banyak hutang, mula aa nak tarik scholarship laa. Nak tarik loan aa. Dulu cousin aku SPM dapat aggregat 16 pun dapat pergi Jepun. Dapat scholarship PETRONAS lagi. Ni sekarang konon negara dah maju tapi nak belajar tinggi pun kena cari duit sendiri. So kalau datang dari keluarga yg daif, tak payah la belajar amik degree. Jadi mat rempit jer aah. Tak pun masuk Akademi Fantasia. Boleh cepat kaya macam Mawi tuh. Glamour cukup. Satu Msia kenal dia.HUH.................

* Working in banking line makes your life sux. Under pressure. Nak carik kerja lain laaa!!! Asyik-asyik kena panggil meeting.Terasa macam BOD plak..

* I have a new kitten - MiMi.But I still miss my CiCi...

* I really miss Eryn & Zhan and Ikan & Finy. We used to be so close, aight? But now we are so far apart.. I wish I could turn back time esp during our days together masa duduk kat Hillpark. Good ol' days.

* I have misused my credit cards laa..Uwaa!!!!!!!!!

Rimasnya!!

2005-08-02T22:53:00.000+08:00

Remember in my last entry I said Im having a bad sorethroat? Yeah, when I woke up the next morning @ 6am, terus demam. Batuk & pening. Tekak perit tak payah citer aa..Syok rasa dia! And so I sms-ed my boss telling him that Im on MC. Later that morning I went to the clinic.. Doctor cakap aku ader tonsil yg agak teruk. That I must drink a lot of plain water n quit smoking. Quit Smoking. A very tough task for me. Tried a few times but failed easily. But this time, I have to! Sebabnya klau tak, tonsil tu akan melarat dan bernanah dan kena operate..huh.. taknak laa sampai camtu..
Dah 2 hari menanggung kesakitan bahana nikotin ni. Pagi tadi sampai office je, boss nampak muka yg pucat lesi mih, terus dia suruh ambik cuti 2 hari & rehat kat rumah. Baik laa plak En.Azmi nih... :-)
Nampak gaya nya esok pun belum tentu baik lagi nih.. Rimas laa rasa dia.. Package. Demam, sakIt tekak, batuk, pening paler & selsema....
Lepas nih kalau tak insaf lagi, tak tahu laa nak cakap apa..! tak benti gak hisap rokok tuh, memang sah laa affy ni degil......

Pupus

2005-07-31T23:02:00.000+08:00

I'm home early tonite. This happens very2 seldom. I lost my mood actually. Someone yelled at me for no solid reason. Nak kata PMS, is a HE laa plak.. huh! Nasib aku tak baik la kot time tuh... :-( Nak marah balik, kawan baik, tak sampai hati. Nak ambik hati merajuk-rajuk, bukan bf aku. So, biar jer laa..
Im lying on my messy bed, updating my blog using my beloved Baby O2 while listening to Pupus by Dewa.. I love this song! Lirik yg agung. Yeah, yeah... Some might say," Leh?? baru nak dengar lagu nih?? Gila jauh ketinggalan..". Jawapan dia " Diamm ahh! Suka hati aku laa!". Lagu nih mmg bisa merobek hatiku... ahh, persetankan semuanya!!
Bytheway, Im having a very bad sorethroat now. Perit. Hisap rokok rasa macam tekak nih terbakar..Hmm, speaking about ciggies, Im feeling hopeless..
1 day = RM 6.50 (20s)
1 mth = RM 6.50 x 30 = RM 195.00
1 yr = RM 195.00 x 12 = RM 2340.00

Fuhhh!!! Kalau melabur dalam ASB, cukup setahun,dapat
RM 234.00 as dividends. Tapi sebab melabur kat rokok,3 bulan sekali sakit tekak! Untung2, paru-paru pun hitam disaluti tar. huh...DEGIL! We shall just wait & see bila Afidatul Asne Ibrahim akan katakan tak nak pada rokok.... ;-p

Charmingaffy Vs Carelessaffy

2005-07-13T14:58:00.000+08:00

huh....im back here..rasa macam biscuits plak.kejap ader kejap takder...
many things happened to me recently....paling sedih bila O2 aku (err..sorry po!) terjatuh buat kali kedua padahal time tuh baru pakai seminggu. Kena antar gi service center sebab tak boleh on!! Sedey giler aku!!! Then the next best thing was, I accidentally dropped Toddy's camera to the swimming pool..kena ganti la plak camera dia ..Todd, kalau tak ganti boleh tak?? Bukan penting pun camera tuh..popo ader camera, pinjam jer lah dia punya...huh...pastuh both my handphones (sebenarnya satu tuh kuman punya) pun rosak sebab peristiwa jatuh kat dalam pool bodoh tuh! I guess charmingaffy tuh patut tukar jadi carelessaffy lah...huh.......................

HELP!! Im bored of my job. I need something more challengging laa wei.. Kerja sekarang asyik bagi peluang tuk aku makan, makan, makan and as the result aku gained another 2 fuckin kilos! I wanna join event management company...be an event coordinator since to be a broadcast journalist is a bit too late for my age, I guess....

And guess what??? In 6 months time more or less aa, I'll turn 26 and Im still single and available!! How cool is that?? "Cool" nya!!! Hmmm...should start doing some marketing for myself now... Cant imagine myself being alone at the age of 30!! Takkan nak jadi cam Carrie Bradshaw tuh??? Scarry. Enuf said.

Wat Ev!!

2005-06-07T21:58:00.000+08:00

huh..bila dah lama tak berblog hari-hari..kau macam takder idea nak tulis apa..padahal dulu boleh jer tulis about anything on nothing! huh...
Rite, since AmBank and AmFinance merged last Wednesday, so all the AmBank staff from seksyen 16 moved in to our office starting yesterday. And semalam aku MC sebab konon sakit perut..Lame giler alasan aku,kan? Dah laa baru sebulan aku keja...Knowing Affy, inilah masalah besar aku..Suka-suka aku jer bila nak gi keja bila nak ponteng keja.. Habit dowh..
So pagi tadi masa aku sampai office,1st thing aku buat slalu ialah pegi toilet betul kan mekap & rambut...hehe.. Pastu bila nak kuar dari ladies tuh cam aku terlanggar sorang mamat nih yang tengah nak gi stor cari benda apa ntah...Takyah aa pagi-pagi lagi dah nak tunjuk rajin...huh.Menyampah lak aku tengok. So cam kat dalam filem melayu lak, bila dah terlanggar tuh pastuh kertas2 dia jatuh laa kat lantai..pastuh cam sesamer cakap sorry and kutipkan balik kertas yang bertaburan tuh..huh..WATEVER!!! Aku pun cam menyampah giler lak aksi pagi tadi...
And I asked my colleague who was that guy tadi and he told me staff AmBankyang baru pindah tuh....hehe...cute gak aa..tapi stok putih2..Aku memang kurang berkenan sikit dgn org yang putih-putih...tapi wangi giler mamat nih! Sumpah wangi tak ingat! Turn on giler aku pagi-pagi kat office tuh..tapi aku tak cam lagi dia pakai perfume apa..huh...
Pastuh dalam sehari kat office tuh asyik tereserempak jer dengan dia...Macam dalam citer hindustan lak..Ingat aku suka?? Tapi suka gak aa..Hehe..
So, aku dah rancang strategi cam maner nak tackle mamat nih...hehe..lama sial tak sharpen my charming skill..tak tau lah boleh pakai lagi ker tak...harap2 valid lagi lah..
So we shall wait and see......may the force be with me (watever,Affy!). Huahahaha

SMS freak!

2005-06-03T11:41:00.000+08:00

Wey korang!!!!!!! Penah tak korang tersalah hantar sms?? You are supposed to send it to A but then you sent it D?? Damn!! It happened to me last 2 days..

En. Azmi is the Head of HP Department so dia adalah boss aku lah kan.. and dia nih memang kurang digemari di office aku nih...so on that particular morning, he asked me to join him for breakfast with some car dealers..I didnt really wanna join them. Reason being sebab 1stly, aku kureng sikit dgn En. Azmi nih..sebab dia kalau cakap tak boleh benti seminit pun! Sumpah tak tipu. Pastuh dia suka ulang2 citer...2 minit sekali dia ulang citer yang sama.Ni pun sumpah tak tipu. 2ndly sebab malas aa nak join sebab ader sorang salesman tuh cam ulat bulu sikit...

Rite..so, untuk mengelak dari keluar bfast dengan boss aku dan konco-konco nya.. aku pun mendapat idea yang bernas ajak sorang colleague aku ni pi bfast dgn aku... And to communicate, I sms-ed him. "Ezadin, jom pi bfast dgn I skang. I malas tul lah nak pi bfast dgn azmi..". Pastu tetiba aku dengar hp boss aku berbunyi menandakan ada sms yg masuk..Aku tengok hp Ezadin tak berbunyi pun...aik? Tolong aa cakap aku tersalah antar sms... Pastu aku tgk kat hp aku 1 message received "Delivered to En.Azmi". Yess!! Lalalalalalalalalalalalalallalalalla jap la aku.. Meja aku lak betul2 sebelah meja dia. Huh.........Keras aku kat tepi tuh!!

And, seriously his face changed!! Berubah giler pas baca sms tuh! Affy...Affy...apa lah yang kau buat nih?? What were you thinking huh? Why were you so careless??? Damn aa....Time tuh aku rasa memang aku kena benti keja 24jam aa...Ya tuhan...asal laa aku nih bongok sangat?? Dah laa En.Azmi tuh boss aku. Orang yang bertanggungjawab nak confirm kan aku..Orang yang akan sign suma claim claim aku.. Life is always beautiful, huh??

HeLLoOoOO

2005-05-31T21:44:00.000+08:00

Hey..this is my first entry after 3 weeks, huh? isk isk isk... Lamer nya tak update blog.. Rindu laa plak rasa dia nak berblogging...
Well, started my new job as HP Marketing Officer in AmBank Group since 16th of last month. So, what can I say? "Best" office baru nih.. "Ader" internet! "Banyak" PC!! (kau paham tak lawak aku nih kuman?? Tolong aa cakap kau tak paham gak..aku lempang kau kang..). And thats the main reason why I didnt update my blog for ages! Sheesh..
Being in the Marketing line, I get to travel a lot everyday..Have to mobile around. Get to know a lot of people. Different kind of people every fucking day...Sheesh..tiring I shall say. But the only advantage is, I get to mengular all the time..Dapat claim minyak lak tuh..Makan free tiap2 hari..Syoknya syoknya, kawanku! Hehehe... Bottom line, so far I love this job. Not that bad I guess...Ingat kan dulu tak best...Bagus gak mak aku suh aku amik offer nih dulu..Tu lah...dengar cakap ibu nih memang berkat aa dunia akhirat.
Rite, it's kinda late oredi now...I have to make a move from Gasing now or else sampai rumah lambat lak nanti.. Aku "suka" dengar mak aku bising2 nanti..Huh.................
Till then, take care peeps! Adios

PEACE?

2005-05-12T10:57:00.000+08:00

A shout out to someone I know...

Yes I am feeling betrayed by you. Someone I call friend. Among all of my friends, you are one of yang aku paling sayang no matter how mean you were to me at times. You are like a big brother to me. I really look up at you. And I realy care for you. I really do.

Im sorry for trespassing your privacy. I admit it was my fucking fault. My bad. Im really sorry.

Yes, we both hurt each other. You hurt me by bitching at my back. I hurt you by tresspasing your privacy. So for whatever reasons we might have for our actions, let's just forgive and forget. For God sake, I dont wanna make things worst between us. I dont wanna ruin the friendship. I dont wanna have another sleepless night. Tired of crying myself to sleep. And above it all, I dont wanna lose you as a friend. Cant afford that, I guess....

Hola!!

2005-05-11T15:16:00.000+08:00

I think I've talked tOo much. So I shall keeP my fuCking mOuth sHut. Maybe it's beTTer this way... AdiOss.

DOUBLE A NO JAM CHALLENGE

2005-05-10T18:38:00.000+08:00

Calling out to friends, ex-colleagues, family & future networks,
Support the Backup Team, The VigilantVirgins of Li-Ann (Pita) and Affy as they pit against the Dream Team in the HITZ.FM DOUBLE A NO JAM CHALLENGE to take back RM20,000 cash at the end of the week! Only time can tell which team takes the PRIZE home! And 6.00pm, 13th May (Friday) will be the answer to fulfilling our dreams.
Basically the Dream Team’s task is to race around Malaysia in 5 days (9/5 – 13/5) and complete all challenges correctly and on time. They have been given RM1,500 for their week’s expenditure but frankly speaking, that’s quite a lot and ok to me. A lot of peeps are saying that it’s not enough to last for the week but if I were on the Dream Team it will be more than enough! They have to make it back to KL this 13th May by 6pm and if they don’t, the Backup Team gets the good stuff! Simple as that! We just have to wait and see them blowing their chance.
But, we’re not just gonna seat back home and relax. The Backup Team is gonna do all they can to win this! We have some devious thoughts in mind which may just slow them down or force them to spend all their limited cash. That’s the game plan of how we can win the loot on the 5th day. We are not with the Dream Team on their quest, so we need all the help we can get. Be our Support Group memberSo, wherever you may be, help us out by slowing down the Dream Team. HOW you may ask? Here are some tips:
One
Tune in to Hitz.fm every hour of the day (when u can) from 9th May – 13th May to check the location of the Dream Team. Currently (as at 2:00pm) they are on their way to Penang. Should you be anywhere nearby them, go up to them being nice and helpful and if they need directions to some place familiar, do what you can to divert them to another famous place or pace down your conversation with them. Slow talk……..it’s about slow talk to delay their tasks.
Two
At some point of time, they are required to make mandatory purchases of items. Should you bump into them, ask them what their purchases are, and show them the MOST expensive place where they can get ‘em. Our chances in winning this, gets closer each time their spending cash depletes. Try not to mention/ act blur if questions are raised whether you’re rooting for the Backup Team. Change the topic or act normal and pretend you’ve heard them on the radio.
Three
We are allowed to play around with the Dream Team’s clues but to do it discreetly. As we are not told what their clues are or know where they’re heading next, the radio will be our Best Friend right through the week. You can assist us by calling in, e-mailing or text messaging us anytime of the day informing us of any suspicious clue you’ve found in whichever state you’re at. Hints: Clues may be found by following paper trails (with the NO JAM CHALLENGE logo printed on Double A paper) or spotting a Banner, Bunting or Flyer with the HITZ.FM DOUBLE A NO JAM CHALLENGE print on them. Those may be highly likely places where the Dream Team can be found.
If you find paper trails, try messing them around so they do not lead to the exact location for their next clue. We are not baddies after all, just going on with our got-to-do-it schemes to have an advantage over them. This quest is a cross between the Amazing Race and Survivor series. We have to do what we can to outwit and outlast the Dreamers!
Four
The Dreamers have to do all they can to save their spending money and which means they might even end up having plans of begging, turning on their *sweet charm/ flirting (Jas is capable of doing so) to buy their way out of paying for something, or do more ridiculous stuff like washing toilets or plates/ creating a disgusting dish for sale. Don’t bother, don’t buy anything (I bet they’ll terribly mark-up the $$$ if they’re short of money) and just go on doing your thing. If they flag you down, try not to be utterly nice to them or say something like “Girl, you’re trying too hard to get help here. Your eyelashes look like they are about to fall off!” or “Someone as pretty as you should already have a man by your side to help you out, and it’s definitely not me! I do not want to end up with a badly-smashed face!” or “Wah! Have to pay so much for this Rojak ah! Even my mum can do a better job at it and the best thing is I do not have to pay at all!” EEEeeeeeeeHaHAHAHA (cunning laughter!)
Five
Back us up by being our SUPPORT GROUP. Call, e-mail or sms anyone of us if you happen to spot the Dreamers at your town, or if you have your own unbeatable tactics/strategies to share with us! Before any interesting move you decide to perform, give us a call or share it with us as well. Perfect allies work well hand in hand! Get a chance to have your name, ideas & opinions shared with JJ & Rudy (Morning Crew) on Hitz.fm! Just drop us a line…………..

***The Dream Team is dressed in a white “Hitz.fm Double A No Jam Challenge” t-shirt (wordings in shades of Blue) with slogans of “No Jam, No Stress” printed on the sleeves.
TWO TEAMS…….ONE AIM……RM20,000……….TIME WILL TELL……….. BUT YOU CAN START MAKING A DIFFERENCE!
CONTACT US WITH UPDATES OF YOUR OWN!
DREAM TEAM, DREAM ON! MAY THE FORCE BE STRONG WITH THE VIGILANTVIRGINS! HuHuHuhuhuhuhuhhhhuuuuuggggrrhhhhhhh! THANK YOU TO ALL YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.

Broken

2005-05-09T18:29:00.000+08:00

I've just discovered something that really made my heart broken into pieces. My day was good until this very moment when I found out that a good friend of mine bitched about me at my back with another good friend of mine ( ker aku jer yg perasan yg diaorang tuh good friend aku?? huh..). Frustrated. Shocked. My heart fell to the floor. Berkecai. How could they do this to me?? Macam tak percaya jer. I love them. I thought they were my strength to go on with life.

OK. So they call me mengada-ngada. Attention seeker. Bitchy. Someone with high self esteem. I was speechless bila tahu pasal benda nih. Sedih sangat-sangat. I thought they were just kidding when they are mean to me all this while. I thought diorang sajer jer kacau-kacau aku. But unfortunately, they memang hate me...Apsal lar aku nih bodoh sangat?? Apsal tak boleh nampak semua tuh?? Aku makan semut hitam banyak sangat ker?

Rite...Rite.. Aku memang sangat sangat kecewa sekarang nih...But maybe it was realy my fault sebab tak pandai nak sesuai kan diri dengan keadaan. Or maybe I talked to much. Or tak pandai nak ambik hati kawan...or aku nih memamg loser. Or Im just irritating. Annoying. Maybe I shouldnt trust people easily or look up at them when they are actualy looking down at me.

Leave me alone. I shall mend the every pieces of my broken heart.. I really love my friends. I really do. Take care peeps.

Back Up??

2005-05-09T11:49:00.000+08:00

Hiahahaha..huhuhuhu.. I was on air this morning! Been interviewed by the Morning Crew..Jay Jay and Rudy. This is because Im one of the contestant for the Double A No Jam Challenge.. And Im in the Back Up Team (I dont like the word Back Up from the start...). Anyways, Im not gonna talk much on the contest..If I win, I'll get 20 grand.Enuf said... But one thing for sure, Rudy is soooo cute! He's the man! He's cute. He's cute. Is he single? I dont mind dating him...He's cute. Has that bad boy look lar...yum yum.

Tomorrow is gonna be my last day in Bofi, hopefully... So, Im gonna stary my 1st day at AmBank on the 16th..Hopefully it's gonna offer me a new environment... I shall wait and see...

And tadi baru baca blog CHI. Shit. No 7 tuh memang ditujukan untuk aku. Sheesh...Chi, sorry wey..aku tak sengaja wey... Habit kot suka cakap Euww tuh..Aku tak sedar siot. Sorry is all I can say. Janji tak buat lagi...I didnt know that it's goin to offend you that much. My bad. Jangan aa takmo kawan dengan aku lagi wey.. Sedey siot aku..Aku dah aa tak ramai kawan sangat... Sorry wey..

Apart from that, my day is getting on very well... Cheers!

have yOu ever...

2005-05-05T18:50:00.000+08:00

[x] are u single, married or taken? single and not interested. nOt yet..
[x] have u ever been deeply in love ? haha.. u tell me
[x] are u currently in love ? err..err..
[x] with ? err...err...
[x] have u ever had a bad relationship ? my last one is the worst
[x] how old were u when u started dating ? err...14 yrs old.
[x] are u predictable ? unpredictable all the way..err, yaka??
[x] do u like surprises ? yess..always but never get one :-(
[x] u think friends can become lovers ? why the hell not??
[x] u think lovers can become friends ? a big NO-NO
[x] what are u willing to do?? hah? depends for who lar..
[x] have u ever had an ex u wanted to kill ? sadly, nOpe!
[x] how is she/he now ? God knows
[x] have u ever been hurt ? yaa...very painful woo
[x] have u ever hurt anyone ? err..didnt mean to..sowwy
[x] do u forgive and forget ? forgive, yess..but unfortunately never forget
[x] is love lovelier the 2nd time around ? no idea
[x] fling or long term relationships ? at the mOment, I prefer fling fling..
[x] are u for commitments ? when i want to...
[x] are u easy to love ? easy to like but hard to fall in love leh..
[x] are u a good friend ? i definately am!
[x] how long was ur longest relationship ? about 3 1/2 years
[x] what's the shortest ? err...3 months. (u can call it love aa?)
[x] is there one person that has hurt u the most ? yes, my ex but couldnt be bothered anymore!

Left Outside Alone

2005-05-05T14:30:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I feel this life is soo empty..Tak ada arah tuju..Like when you wake up in the morning, get ready to work. After work, will head to Gasing to chill with the boys...Catch a movie or just dinner..and have a good laugh with them. Reach home later at night...Get scolding from my mom is a bonus of the day. Go to bed and then next morning wake up lazyly and go trough the same routine again. Nothing to look forward..Nothing to be excited about. Nothing seems to cheer me up. Not even when I can mengular the whole day! Or when I lost some weight..(coz CHI will always call me Debab.Huh..)

I had a fight with my mom recently that ended up with her refused to talk to me. Yeah, maybe I was rude to her. But I cant take it anymore... I am 25 years old and Im able to make my own decision. It's my fucking life for God sake. So what if I've made a wrong decision? I will learn from it. Afterall, that's what life is all about. Learning. Why cant she just let me do what ever I want to do? I need freedom for good sake! I know she wants the best for me and I'd appreciate it but sometime what she thinks is best for me might not be the things that makes me happy. I've my own plan of life and somehow I ruined it. Dah lari track dah....But being the only daughter, the eldest, the closest to her.. Tak sampai hati lak nak hurt her.. Whatever it is, she''ll always be my angel. My one and only love of my life despite all the arguments and all the fights.. I want to make her happy and proud of me. Insyaallah. Im trying my best to be a good daughter here. Ya Allah, Permudahkanlah urusan hidupku.Amin. OK. Enuf about her.

Let's bitch about me. I am not occay. Emotionally not stable. Not yet. Not at all! Frankly speaking Im lost. All I need is someone to love, to care, to listen, to pamper and to comfort whenever Im losing my grip..whenever Im feeling hopeless; which is very very often. I need someone to tell me that everything is going to be fine. Everything is goin to be ok. I just want to hear goOd things.And why when Im feeling deppress, feeling down, feeling fucked up or feeling whatever shit that Im not supposed to feel, they said Im just another psychopath girl who is so difficult, so mengada-ngada, and so hard to please? On top of that they said Im an attention seeker?? Am I? Am I really that difficult? Am I really that bad? Am I really being so bitchy?? Am I?? I dont know and maybe I dont intend to know because if I know, I'll be depress and tend to think about it too much and go psycho.Told myself that I shouldnt take it seriously, shouldnt think of it that much. Shouldnt care about what people think of me. But I cant. I just cant. Somehow, I will care what people think of me. I just want to be a girl that everybody loves to be with..that everybody adores..Mcm Everybody loves Raymond tuh..I want to satisfy everyone who knows me. I hate when people talk bad about me...Arrgghhh...Im just being so difficult to myself,kan?? Of course it's impossible to do so.. What was I thinking, huh??

Im feeling unwanted. By everyone. By my mom. By my friends and even by myself (and also by my ex..of course! But couldnt be bothered anymore. Who cares if he doesnt care for me anymore? It's his lost. Not mine anyways..). And why the hell am I having this feeling?? This stoopid feeling that Im not suppose to feel? I really want to know where this shit comes from (Owh God please lead me the way...) and what do I do to make it go away??

Im so tired to be the one yang kena give, give give..I gave so much, for so long...I've been so generous. But I didnt get the same in return. I know we are not supposed to expect it back... tapi kenapa aku jer yang kena faham orang? Kenapa aku jer yang kena amik hati orang? Kena pamper orang? Kenapa aku jer kena buat baik kat orang?? Huh..Chi slalu ckp aku kena pijak baik nyer dgn Rafel. Betul kot. Mandorm slalu ckp aku nih mudah tertipu. Betol jugak kot. Tapi takper...Allah tu Maha Adil. Maha Pengasih dan Maha Panyayang. Life is fair. What goes around will comes around. Things happened for a reason..there's always a blessing in disguise. Insyaallah.

Yeah..go on and judge me. I've been judged for so many times, for so many reasons...Im used to it. Everytime Im being judged..I'll go psycho for a while...then susahkan hidup Neb sebab aku akan citer kat dia and waiting for her to comfort me sebab she knows how to make me feel good. Without fail. I love you, Neb... And yeah to whoever said that the world doesnt revolves around me, JUST SHUT UP AND FUCK IT!!

But sometimes, I feel like life is so beautiful.. My mom and my friends really make life worth living. Life could'nt be any better. Especially when my pay & commision are out ontime (which is very very seldom). And having Raju's capati with the ubi gravy and peria for my dinner with the Gasingans. And I can smoke 20 sticks a day without feeling sorry to my body. My skin. My face. Huahahahahaha...

When Im soo free...

2005-05-03T16:03:00.000+08:00

1. black or white? black of course
2.why? makes my boobs & bum smaller
3. amibition when a kid? I wanna be an actress who will marry an anak Menteri /Tan Sri kihkihkih
4. job now? Sales Consultant
5. first thing said when woke up this morning? asal la kena ingat dia pagi-pagi nih?? shyyit aa
6. shower today? duh~ ingat aku W** ker??
7. last ate? Italiannis cortesy of CHI
8. sleep attire? birthday suit
9. perfume? Eternity, Romance, Miracle and Escada
10. most loved person apart from your family? my Gasingan friends & my girlfriends
11. most hated person? no one particular at the moment
12. dance? yes to rnb... soul... jazz....latin
13. last thing you said to your bf? err, I dont have one now..
14. life motto? there's a blessing in disguise...what goes around comes around...
15. current mood? konOn in Love.. konon jer..
16. what comes first in your life? semayang 5 waktu? how I wish...
17. your view of money? money dont grow on trees....
18. what to do to relax? chilling with some really good friends
19. how long to get ready to go out? not that lOng..hehe 1 hour?
20. daily activity you most like? working? haha
21. you most hate? pms
22. height?4ft11 I sapos....
23. prefered spouses height? a head taller than me?
24. most embarrasing moment? when I used to date my ex for 3 1/2 years.. What was I thinking??!
25. happiest moment? when I broke up with an asshole sometime last year & my 25th birthday bash
26. usually sleep at?12 ish
27. shoe size?common size for Msian gals..
28. easily turned on? hmm...gOod smell..yum yum
29. kids? not yet...
30. sex?gender heh? im female la..duh~.....yaka??

Yesterday....

2005-05-02T15:56:00.000+08:00

OK. Today is 2nd of May. Monday. Public holiday for Labour Day. And I was required to work (wtf??). Full day. How about that?? Awesome, aite?? Yup here I am in the office as early as 9.30am while all of my friends pegi berpOya-pOya catching movies laa, makan Zainol laa, bersantai laa or whatever shit laa..

And yeah..I would like to congratulate Ikan and Sham. The newly wed couple... And Ikan, you looked so beautiful in your wedding dress..like..cantiknya Ikan...cantik nya baju kawen Ikan..I like your baju nikah as well...yOu looked so lovely yet simple. The ceremony was great...Khemah yang simple, bunga telor yang cantik, the food was goOd, the bride & groom pun cantik..And yeah, Sham memang handsome...No doubt. (Neb yang cakap mcm tuh..).

Me, Eryn, Ikan and Zhan are best friends from high school...Ikan was my room-mate masa kat 5th College. My housemate kat Hillpark for few years, room mate kat UT and also house mate kat Section 5. We were like belangkas during our uni days.. Where ever you can find Ikan, you can find me too..Hehe dengan keta satria Ikan yg ekzos dia bunyi cam nak meletup!! We've gone through the gOod times and the bad times together..always together. You helped me trough my bad days and so did I during your bad days,kan? We only have each other jer kan that time..Arghh Ikan..I miss those days...One of my best time in life.. We had fun all the way, kan? Ikan, though things are not the same now especially now that you're married..though we are not as close as how we used to be last time..though we hardly see each other nowadays...I just want to let you know that, I will always love you..despite the fights and the arguments.. Our friendship is something that I will treasure till the day I die..Thank you for being such a lovely friend to me through out the years...
Well you are married now. You are a wife and a mother to be..Im so happy for you..Im glad to know that you are having such a beautiful life now... Suka sangat tengok kau happy skang. Penat dah tengok kau sedey2 dulu..Be a good wife to Sham and a good mother, occay? All the best to you and may Allah bless both of you always. My prayers are always with you, Ikan...

And on the same day yesterday, another goOd friend of mine, Zhan aka Kuadik got engaged... And tying the knot end of this year.. Congrats to Zhan and Zul. Well...it looks like Me & Eryn gonna lose another friend... Haa...sekarang nih tinggal Carrie ( ME!) and Samantha ( It has to be Eryn..) jer.. Charlotte ( Ikan) and Miranda (zhan) dah gone case.. Sedey nya... Tak cukup korum dah nak mengarut..nak buat benda-benda bodoh..Korang cam dah dalam league lain..Dah tak satu team dengan aku & Eryn..

Well Affy, you have to cope with the changes in life..wether you like it or not...Take it or leave it..

BE REALISTIC,PLEASE...

2005-04-26T18:51:00.000+08:00

Hmm, I am feeling feel quite swept away by my own feelings, especially with today's celestial energy. I am also feeling a little resentful that I care so much about someone who does not seem to be responding with equal ardor... ( what else is new about men, huh? Heartless! Huh..). This is a tricky and potentially painful situation, but as usual, if I can get to talk (which I dont prefer having any conversation with him right now..) much could be resolved, and it need not all end in tears, kan?

I really want to believe in the best, to hope that this time everything is going to be pERFECT. But nothing is blemish free, especially as far as relationships are concerned. Be realistic (yeah yeah! watever!!).

But being Affy, Im always psycho. Psychopath girl.

Sunday mornin'

2005-04-24T14:40:00.000+08:00

Sunday mornin' in the office is like my dreams come true! Got nothing much to do so I answered the survey below...

1.Song playing at the moment?--> Cheriot by Gavin De Graw
2.One reason for living?--> God wants me to..
3.Do u think your partner is sexy?--> definately lar..or else why the hell Im with him??
4.Ever donated blood?--> yup and I gained 5kilos after that! Dammit!
5.Fav color?--> red & black
6.Accessories you usually wear?--> earrings
7.One song to describe a heartbreak in the past?--> Till You Do Me Right by After 7
8.Last place you went?--> err, Petaling Street..ok ok, Gasing it is.
9.Last person who disappointed you?--> err, dat fella laa..
10.The most boring sport?--> Netball!
11.Ever had a baby?--> yup! BabyBoy. For 3 1/2 years. Now RIP..
12.Ever had sex before?--> yup with George Clooney last year.
13.The funniest movie you watched in the past week?--> nOne.
14.The most romantic gift?--> nOtting yet.
15.Sang on stage before?--> err had to when I was 15 and swear to God I'll never do it again!!
16.Strucked by lightning before?--> err....I wuldnt b here if I was...
17.Danced with your loved one before?--> yes..with my bf back then and he sucks!
18.Ever wished you could turn back time?--> definately!
19.What would you do if you woke up one day to find yourself to be someone from the opposite sex?--> err... can I change back, please?
20.One song that's meaningful to you?--> aNgeL by shaggy
21.Last person you met?--> The gasingans ( who else,ayte??)
22.What will you be doing tomorrow?--> err, working??!
23.Who's your favorite F4 member?--> wtf??
24.One thing you totally regretted doing?--> ermm...smoking.
25.Do people like you?--> I dont know and dont care but the Gasingans definately do! Hahahaha
26.What was the last game you played on the computer?--> solitaire
27.Someone who means a lot to you at the moment?--> f.R.i.e.n.d.s
28.The color of your mobile phone?--> Gold, White and Green
29. Do you hate someone at the moment?--> No I dont. Never. I dont like to start hating 1..
30. What do you wish to happen now?--> poof*#!! Im 19 yrs old now...poof**!!! im 25 again....haha

My happy meal

2005-04-21T13:46:00.000+08:00

I cant stop munching! Munch.Munch.Munch. Day and night! 24/7.What's wrong with me?? Chics lost 3 kilos in 3 weeks and I seemed to gain a kilo a week! Dammit! My owh my...

Is it true when we are happy, we tend to put on weight?? For example kan, when we ask "Hey, Kai.. lama tak jumpa..berisi yea badan kau sekarang..kihkihkih...Asal arr?". Then the answer will always be... " Berisi yek? Yelah.. hati senang...". Yeah..yeah..Wat ev! We always find that answer as lame. But it's true kan? kan? Hati senang, gemuk aa..Benci betul! Kalau sedih-sedih, sure tak lalu makan..Best-best! Boleh kurus. Ceh! Been there done that.

So, kesimpulan dari citer aku kat atas tadi...I gained some bloody kilos because Im happy now? Is that it? True aa? How true?? Happy ker aku sekarang nih?? Kenapa happy aa? I dont know.. but what I do know is..It has been awhile since I last cried..There's always a rainbow at the end of a dark tunnel, aight??

Well, ever since the broke up 15 months ago, my life is not only better, happier & healtier now but I also seem to have an extra happiness lately...(Oh God knows how sincere the statement was...)Actually not that very very happy, laa..but it's goOd enuff to survive. To go on with life..

Like what BoyzIImen say lar..Im dOin just fine. Yeah.. just fine. :-) Life is Beautiful, kan?? Adios

Love U, Love U not

2005-04-20T13:22:00.000+08:00

Can someone please tell me wether Im in LoVe or am I not!! Because Im a lil bit confused here.

I know Im in love when the thought of him kept haunting me.. Day and night. He's the first thing I'd wish to see in the morning as soon as I open my eyes and the last thing I 'd wish to see before I close my eyes or even while Im sleeping! I just dont want to miss a thing about him!! But this time, I dont really think of the new him that much..Not like 24/7...Im not that excited though..No butterflies in my stomach...Am I in love? Im not, right?? Dont seem like it pun..

But..if Im not in love, why do I like spending my time with him everyday? Do I really enjoy his company or is it just because Im lonely?? Argghh....Affy, what kind of game are you playing here,bitch??

U go girl!!

2005-04-18T14:52:00.000+08:00

I start my Monday morning with joy..I've won myself Coffee Bean voucher worth 50bux from HitzFm. Nothing great lar sebab tuh hadiah kesian jer. Aku punya jawapan salah. But it has been awhile since I've won anything. So, 5o bux will do, I guess..and ni tengah ada aura2 charming tuh baik aku masuk semua contest yang ader..No harm trying, aite?

And this is the time of the month again where I'll gain another unwanted 2kilos in a week. My owh my.. Aku makan macam the world is gonna end tomorrow! No kidding! I spent 30 bux for my lunch on junk food itself! Ice cream lar...Cookies lar...Candy lar...Doughnut lar...Chocolate lar..Brownies lar...(Perut aku rasa cam nak meletup skang nih!!) Kan best jadi lelaki. Nafsu satu jer. Tak pikir benda lain dah...

Well, Im quiting this job soon...Got the offer from AmBank. Kat Shah Alam. TAK BEST LANGSUNG. 1st sebab there will be no excuses to lepak Gasing and balik lambat. 2ndly, tak boleh mengular dah. Damn! 3rdly, gaji aku turun menjunam!! Orang selalu tukar keja sebab dapat better offer kan? And Shah Alam?? Giler ke aper?? Bandar tuh bandar mati la wey..aku nak lunch kat mana nanti?? Alam Sentral?? But...I'll do it for the sake of my mom. Anyway, it's not that bad working in the bank, aight? Proper working hour, I shall say..Unlike this one I have now..Mana ader orang keja hari Ahad kan?? Sampai pukul 6.30 plak tuh...tapi boleh mengular selalu...Tuh yang syiok tuh..

Harap-harap office baru aku nanti akan ader ramai colleague yang hensem2...So that aku boleh sharpen my skills...Ready or not? Here I come!! And harap-harap aku akan menang something from either Mix or Hitz Fm tonite...Daaa.....

Fav time of my life...

2005-04-14T16:26:00.000+08:00

Well, hopefully it's not too late for me to write about my birthday bash (with Shidi & Shapeng) at Pizza Uno last Monday night. All I can say is, it was a BLAST!! It really was. The party went smooth all the way. All the way. I would like to thank each and everyone who turned up that nite and made it happening! Here's the list. Jeg, Popo, Kuman, Stone, Mandorm, Remie, Gaban, Haizal, Todd, Wan, Elyas, Cajun&Tippie, Hapez, Kuril, Gbum, Shinchan, Amin,Neblina, Marini, Eryn & Kai. And Keng, the party would be perfect & complete only if you were there that night...How I wish..

And this time aku dapat Eternity for my birthday gift. A BIG THANK YOU to all of you. Eternity is my fav of all time. Kuman, thanx for the MNG voucher as well..never thought of it since I messed with you the other day...and shinchan too..appreciated it. Very much indeed. sheesh..terharu betul lah..Tak sangka lak korang beli hadiah mahal2..wey, korang betul ker sayang aku nih?? sheesh... *cough* guy magnet *cough* Isk..isk..isk..This is the second time korang betul-betul buat aku terasa disayangi (sangat!) dan dihargai. First time masa aku punya convocation day. I made it a record when I actually received 16 bouquets of flowers on that day!! *cough* charming *cough* KihKihKih..

Come to think about it, I dont know how long this will last...I mean the the friendship among us. The closeness. The fun. The joy. The so-called brotherhood thingy. As much as I want it to last forever, I know I cant. We all will have a life of our own. We will somehow move to other stage of life. Sooner or later. It hurts to face the fact but thats how life works. Everything that has a start will surely has an end. And I shall pray hard to God that it will not end in this near future. Im not ready to let it go yet. Not yet. And if it ever ends, make it a memorable ones..I dont want it to end just like that..No way!

To all my beloved friends, thank u for making my life worth living. This is the greatest love of all...despite the fights, despite being mean to me (uhm..*cough*Popo*cough*Jeg*cough*Mandorm*cough*). So let's just cherish it while we still can!!!

p/s : To Stone, stop feeling depressed. My advise would be, enjoy the life that you have now.. Life is very short nowadays, maa...

Too much! Too much!

2005-04-09T12:02:00.000+08:00

Tension nya aku smlm tak boleh tido langsung!!! My body was so exhausted tapi I cant doze off. Not even for half an hour. Nicotine banyak sangat dalam badan.. Aku buat record baru semalam and Im so ashamed of myself. Bear in mind that Im not trying to be proud here. Just telling you guys how stoopid I was yesterday nite.

Masa tengah layan collection mp3 Popo (terbaik!! Aku salute kau Po..) about 1 and the half hour, 6 sticks gone. Then from Shell Gasing (where I bought my 20s) to Jalan Duta (hantar shidi balik konon Kuala Kangsar-padahal balik Penang jumpa awek! sheesh...), 4 sticks gone. While waiting for the bus to arrive another 2 sticks gone back to back. On my way back to Gasing, another 4 sticks gone - none stop. Tak putus. Dinner time only 1 stick. On the way back to Klang, 3 sticks gone. Bila tak boleh tido pagi tuh another 1 stick gone. Huh...??? So total 21 sticks from 7pm to 2am chain smoking.

Shit!! What was I thinking?? Told you I am a chain smoker. If I could give anything to make me quit smoking, I would. Im tired of waking up in the morning, rasa sakit kat dada..Tired of wasting my money too... Nak hisap benda lain lah camnih.. yang bukan sajer tidak menghabiskan duit malah menyihatkan badan.. :-) Tapi takder stok lagi aa..sheesh... Chiow Peeps!

Thoughts Of The Day

2005-04-06T18:22:00.000+08:00

Thought Of The Day #1

"Love is everything it's cracked up to be…It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for."
— Erica Jong
I would say, BULLSHIT!

Thought Of The Day #2

"All love that has not friendship for its base is like a mansion built upon the sand."
— Ella Wheeler Wilcox, poet and journalist
Aiya..Very difficult woo like this..

Forgiveness is all I asked for...

2005-04-05T15:30:00.000+08:00

Feeling down today. It's about Kuman. He refused to answer my calls, to reply all my smsses and refused to talk to me, apa ntah lagi nak jumpa aku for the past 1 week. It hurts. Well, Kuman, if so happen kau baca blog aku nih..I would like to say this to you,

Dude, Im truly sorry. Terribly sorry. From the bottom of my heart. I swear to God I didnt mean to hurt you. I am sorry for the mess I've caused..and for hurting your feelings. God knows how bad I felt about this..Sorry,dude :-(

And I shall pray harder to God..I will. Of course I will..

Err, Boarding school??

2005-04-04T12:12:00.000+08:00

Yuhuu..Monday morning here was quiet..Relaxing..Smoothing..my GM was in a very good mood these past few days. Pheew! Thank goodness.
Had dinner with Todd, Remie, Stone and Shidee last nite at Jamal. I had rojak for starter then Maggi Goreng afterwards. Isk..isk..isk..Maggi goreng Jamal memang yg terbaik aa! But the rojak was so-so jer. I prefer rojak kat Pelita SS2. Kuah dia sedap nak mamposs. Tu tak kira dia punya Ayam yang kuah itam2 tu..Ya Tuhan..Tuhan jer tahu betapa sedapnya! (hehe..Ayat ini ditujukan khas buat Keng yang jauh diperantauan..).

We had a good time yesterday nite.As usual la..Budak2 ni memang suka buat lawak2 bodoh.. Pastu suka lebih-lebih. Padahal lawak tuh biasa jer..tapi diorang punya menambah2 citer...Serious saiko! We talked about those days masa kat boarding school. Tapi citer Kamal ( Yup! The bantingan. What ever happened to him aa??) yang jadi pembuka cerita..We talked about how his hair used to be soo straight tak gerak-gerak and ader lentik sikit kat bawah tuh.. Kepala dia gerak kiri kanan pun tapi rambut dia still straight tak bergerak and siap boleh gantung baju tuh kat rambut dia yg melentik kat bawah tuh..KahKahKah. Shidi suka citer lebih2. Remie pun menambah2 citer. Bila Todd masuk campur, that's it lahh..Tak sakit perut kan ketawa smlm?? Wei, grow up boleh tak???

And yeah..Speaking about boarding school life. Errm, apart from Banting, tak pernah experience pun..I was in sekolah biasa from std 1 and all the way till form 5. Dapat banyak A pun tak dapat masuk asrama.. Isk..isk..isk...Tak der rezeki kot. I was so disappointed tak dapat masuk asrama after my UPSR.. siap nangis-nangis tuh..tapi lama-lama macam dah tak kisah. I prefer my life back then..But after listening to their stories masa duduk kat asrama tuh mcm best gak...Ye'ah..you have to create pape so that tak rasa boring.. so akan ader banyak lah benda-benda bodoh yang akan dibuat,kan?? Benda-benda bodoh yang aku pernah buat kat skolah takder lah jahat sangat pon aku rasa sebab sekolah aku suma pempuan. Pernah skali tuh, aku kena panggil masuk bilik pengetua just because aku pakai black bra (mak aku yang belikan..aku pakai jer aa). And since my dad was the pengetua's friend so she asked my dad to come to the school..Eleh sebenarnya pengetua tuh nak mengurat bapak aku..ingat aku tak tau? and satu lagi benda jahat aku buat masa skolah2 dulu ialah mencuri..hehe kat klang parade. Skali tuh kena tangkap la plak..Nasib baik bapak aku tak marah..Cool daddy!

Bila aku masuk Banting, I was home sick for 2months!! I called my mom every night and cried over the phone. And kebetulan plak my gang that time (Fatihin, Ikan, Neblina & Marini) memang sekor pun tak pernah duduk asrama..so ader lah yang menagis dalam toilet aa tiap2 kali mandi, ader yang mogok tak nak makan seminggu lah..macam-macam lah..Tapi Bantinglah tempat bermulanya episod baru dalam hidup aku. Tempat yang banyak mengajar aku erti persahabatan yang sebenar (Euww!) And I would say 3rd sem is the best time of my life. Seriously the best time of my life!!!!!! Chiow.

Mommy..please understand.

2005-04-02T14:10:00.000+08:00

It's been awhile since my last entry,huh? I was on leave on Thursaday and was off yesterday. And today Im back in the office with loads of work to be done. Isk...Isk...Isk...
This morning I woke up feeling lazy to work. Was late too. Luckily my GM is off today..Pheeww!! Or else, sure kena fuck from her (Sorry. This is the term usually used in the office. Kena fuck from Jamie..).

I catched a movie yesterday night. Spanglish. Funny but not as expected. After movie went for late supper, picked Kai up at the office and sent her back. By the time I reached home it was already 1.15am. My mum waited me at the front door and screamed at me. " Do you know what time is it now?? For God's sake it already 1 plus in the morning!! Mana ader anak dara balik lambat2 macamni?? Yada yada yada...". I didnt dare to look at her face but ran into my room, closed the door, switched on the fan but not the light and went to bed. And I can still hear her voice screaming at me..Sheesh..Marah giler siot mak aku smlm..I felt bad. Very bad. Very very bad indeed. I cried a little. And this morning she didnt wake me up but asked my younger brother to wake me up instead..And she didnt talk to me. Neither do I. Not the right time, I guess.. Takper..takper..malam karang aku pujuk dia aa..Kena balik awal malam nih..Kalau tak, jadi Si Tanggang la aku. Konpem.

Here's the thing. I cant help it but will be home late every night. I repeat. Every night. 11pm is the earliest. I know my mom is lonely. She needs me to accompany her since Im the only daughter she has and my younger brothers are always busy with their own things and my dad doesnt talk much at home. Correction- My dad doesnt talk at all at home! I'd love to gossip and bitch around with her but I just cant stay at home. Every night sure ader plan. Paling tak pun gi makan2 dengan the Gasingans..sheeshh...cant resist those Gasingans friends laa..

Well,I thought of moving out from my parents' place but..I think I am financially not stable and my mom will not approve this proposal of mine anyways so just forget about it...Hmm, I love freedom. I dont like to be told what to do. I'd do what I want to do. I dont take orders. I give them. Im a true Arian. Why cant my mom thinks like the orang putih people? Be cool la..Since Im 25 yrs old already, I should have a life of my own. I'm able to make my own decision. It's my life anyway...As long as I dont mess with her life, then it's fine, right? Right?? Why cant my mom treat me like an adult?? Im not 7yrs old girl. Im a big girl maa..I can take good care of myself, Insayaallah. Why cant my mom trust my decision? And if it's a wrong one, then I'll learn from it,right?? Sheessh...I just dont get it!

Sometimes it feels good to be the only girl in the family. You'll have the advantages. The privilleges. But sometimes, it's killing me.......Being Affy, Im always stubborn. I hate the word obey. For me, rules are meant to be broken...Later!

Amin dan Gen - 2 barunya..

2005-03-28T15:24:00.000+08:00

OK. I would like to thank Haizal for the dinner treat on my birthday..Thank u. That was soo sweet of you..(too bad you are taken or else I would have a chance,aight? hehehe...). Damn laa! And also to Chi for those lovely M.A.C lipstick you bought me.. They mean a lot. Thanx to Amin & Ina for the ride to Mid Valley dengan Gen-2 baru korang tuh..on my birthday nite..Cool,kan Kai? (wei,Amin, tapi aku dengar kau nya lock tuh dah rosak ek?? isk isk isk. Kau patut kerja balik kat Proton aa..They need you laa..)

And I went for a drink with 1 of my client yesterday evening kat Coffee Bean BSC. I really like BSC..A very cool place to hang out. Anyways, so me and the 56 yr old man went for a drink yesterday after our meeting. Then I drove him back to his house at Tropicana..Eleh,aku tau dia sajer jer nak suh aku antar dia balik..Padahal dia boleh jer call driver dia amik,kan? Kan? Pastu ckp, "So Affy, you work every Sundays, yea? Errm, is there any chances to bring you out boating over the weekends ? I have a boat..Perhaps boleh bersiar2 with my boat.." Sheesh..aku pun pastu lalalalalalalala...

Tapi orang tua ni kaya siot!! Rumah dia kat Tropicana tuh memang kecik..Boleh muat 2 orang jer at a time..Kat garage umah dia ader a brand new Jaguar, 2 BMWs, and 1 Rexton..Alaa, kalau dia tu muda skit, bachelor lagi..seres aku dah menggedik2 tapi dah ada 2 bini maa...sheesh..lelaki memang suma gatal2 lah...Esok2 kan bila masing2 dah tua then I bump into Keng ker Stone ker or even Mandorm ker...tau tau korang pun kahwin 2-3 gak...isk isk isk. Tak sabar nya nak tengok korang dah tua2 esok..camner aa? Berapa banyak bini korang ader nanti aa??

And today, I had Sushi King alone..mula2 ajak Kai tp dia nak gi mkn dgn ex coll dia..so aku tak tahan dan pegilah makan sorang2..sheesh..1st time makan kat public sorang2..Rasa cam loser pun ader gak..tapi takper.. rambut aku cantik arini..And self esteem aku tinggi arini sebab pakai lipstik M.A.C yg Kai bagi tuh..Twig tuh mmg cun bangat la Kai..Toche toche.

Thank U Thank U

2005-03-26T14:51:00.000+08:00

Rite..So today is THE day. My birthday. My 25th birthday.. I catched a movie ysterday nite and had a supper at Pelita Bangsar with a friend of mine ( and I bumped into Abone & Ezy.. Huh..Kai, Let's bitch about it..). The movie which recommended by my darling Kai was... kinda stoopid lah. I didnt enjoy it. I was expecting something like Shutter (the best horror movie of the year!) if not better..but...isk..isk..isk..citer bodoh lah. Tak takut langsung hantu2 dia..unlike Shutter. Potret Mistik aku konpem tak nak tengok. Takut menggigau malam nanti. Dengar advert dia kat Hitz pun dah scary giler..(Whatev!)

Thank U to those who have wished me.. Aunty Faridah, Izyan, Kimin, Kuman, Todd, Haizi, Jegged, Shidi dude, Stone, Meen, my lil bros Fahmy n Fadly, my darling angel-Mama, Neblina, Hana, Eryn, Kai @ Chi, Popo Honey, Mandorm, Shapeng, Ajib, Keng, Ninie, Alek, Shkib, Lava and Haizal...my GM, Jamie (hehe dia bagi aku balik awal harini. cool bangat!), my colleagues- Julai, Raymond and Daniel (our bigboss's son).

And I know you guys sure pening2 nak beli aper tuk aku for my birthday prezie..No worries..I'll make your life easier by listing it down..Here we go..

1) Mini O2 ( but Nokia 7270 will do) RM 1999/RM2600
2) Furla Pink small purse RM 500
3) DKNY Glasses RM 799
4) A new pair of Guess Jeans RM 425
5) A Brown Miniskirt frm Topshop RM 180
7) Estee Lauder lipstick x2 RM 140
8) Eternity by cK 100ml RM 260
9) A green blouse & a knee length skirt by ZARA RM 400++
10) A charm bracelet from Diamond & Platinum RM 1800
11) A Sling bag - soft leather by FURLA RM 599 (after less)
12) A red Polo shirt by cK RM 389
13) A pair of shoes from Timberland RM 499
14) Forever and Ever by CD RM 180
15) A brown clutch from Topshop RM 119
16) A baby-T from FCUK RM 129
17) A denim jacket from Esprit RM 399 (now got less oo..30%)

OK. That's about it for now peeps..........enjoy shopping for me ya!! Hehe

If I could I would...

2005-03-24T18:13:00.000+08:00

Time flies kan these days? Did you guys realise that it has been a week since the Tsunami Concert tuh? It was last Friday and tmro is already another Friday..Time flies like shit laa.. 2005 dah nak masuk bulan April and Im going to be 25 soon. Very soon. (hint! hint!) Next month is going to be my 7th month working in Bofi. Isk isk isk.. Sekejap tul rasa dia.

Life is short laa nowadays.. There's soo many things to do and so little time. And also with so little money. Rasa mcm baru jer celebrate my 24th birthday and eh eh...dah nak kena celebrate lagi?? ( THE question is : will there be any celebration or not this year??) Pastu dah abis bulan April and masuk bulan May. When June comes, dah half a year dah..Cepat kan? My new year resolution isnt fulfill yet.. How?

Looking back, how I wish I could turn back time..turn back when I was 20. And am able to tell myself not to do those silly mistakes I've done. I was so naive back then. That year actually has changed my whole entire life. If only I could....

The stick

2005-03-24T10:53:00.000+08:00

Hohohoh..Im early 2work this morning. Sajer jer tunjuk rajin kat GM aku yg cool bangat tuh. Bagi dia cepat2 confirmkan aku so gaji aku boleh naik lagi and aku boleh bayar fee Fitness First that Im going to join with Kai soon. Hehehe...Flat tummy, here I come!
OK. So Kai passed me the stick long long time ago and since I've got nothing to do....so here we go...

1. What is the total amount of music files on your computer?
What computer? Owh..mine is still in Ain's (Ain Shinchan) place. Err, cant really recall laa..

2. The CD you last bought?
BoyzIImen - Evolution
Toni Braxton - Secrets

3. What was the last song you listened to before reading this message?
Crazy - Kci & Jojo

4. Write down five songs that you often listen to or that mean a lot to you.
5 jer?? Alaa..takper. They asked for 5, I'll give 5.

i) After Tonight - Mariah Carey
ii) Januari - Glenn
iii) Doin Just Fine - BoyzIImen
iv) Unpretty - TLC
v) All my Life - Kci & Jojo
vi) Thank U in Advance - BoyzIImen
vii) 4 Season of Loneliness - BoyzIImen
viii) All Cried Out - Allure
ix) You'll always be my baby - Mariah Carey
x) So Yesterday - Hillary Duff
xi) The Reason - Hoobastank
xii) Can't Take that away - Mariah Carey
xiii) Since You've been gone - Kelly Clarkson
xvi) Butterfly - Mariah Carey
xv) Ku Mohon - Sheila Majid
xvi) Accidently in Love - Counting Crow
xvii) Selagi Ada Cinta - Ning Baizura
xviii) If I could - Innuendo
?) Unbreak my heart - Toni Braxton
I did say 5 jer tadi kan...alaa, cant help it la. Sowwy

5. Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons) and why?
i) Keng - another die hard fan of BoyzIImen
ii) Stone - collection lagu2 90's dia boleh tahan..
iii) Kuman - nak tau concert siapa yg berpotensi utk dia pegi lak pasni..

And here's a shout out to someone I dont know and I dont intend to know, brian r.
Stay away from me. I'd appreciate it. Thank you.

Im back.Back with a BANG!!

2005-03-23T13:35:00.000+08:00

For some stoopid reason I deleted my blog...but after some consideration, I've decided to start blogging again. Sheesh..it's very true when they said Im a fickle minded kinda person. Cant have a mind of my own. Rite, Rite..Life has been very hard and mean to me lately but I managed to survive. Thank God. Shit happens to everyone, everytime. But I managed to mend every pieces of my broken heart..

Rite..A msg from someone I know last 2days has made my blood go upstairs. Disappointing. Why do people always have to judge me without knowing me that well?? Why do we have to judge other people without knowing them?? Why do we love judging people?? 1st, I've been judged for being a lady smoker. An anonymous who was so coward to leave his/her name said that "we call women smokers ...sluts". Errm, very shallow and narrow thinking, I shall say. Im not going to discuss bout this again. And now, I've been labelled as "kurang ajar" or "takder bahasa" for being unfriendly. Me, unfriendly? Doesnt ryhme that well, aight? Maybe it's true I was so aloof and ignored her but sure for a reason. A good ones, I should say...arrggrhh, we love judging a book by it's cover, dont we?

I may look stern and hard to approach but the fact is Im very friendly and easy to get along with. Please..I dont need you to judge me...